Family Ethnographic Observation

It was a chilly and windy Tuesday afternoon at Kiwanis Park. "Grace", the mother of the family we would meet with, chose the park so that the kids could play. The weather had been nice before that Tuesday. Nonetheless, I kept a positive attitude about the whole situation. We all agreed in advance to bring our own dinners. As I pulled into the parking lot of the park there were several people around. I couldn’t help but wonder which one was our family. I got out of the car with my dinner and saw my partner walking toward me. We both looked around trying to guess if they were here yet. We headed toward the picnic tables under the shelter. We sat in one of the nooks to block the wind. We sat there in anticipation watching as cars came in and out of the parking lot. Elsie got up to go move her car closer when she spotted Grace and her children. I immediately got up to greet them. Grace had her hands full with their dinner as we all introduced each other. "Derek," the oldest, asked if we were new and what we were doing here. I told him we were here to visit with him and his family. Derek held out his arm to me and said, "well, let’s go then." I linked his arm and knew this was going to be a great experience.

We all sat down and Derek led the conversation. He was just as curious about us as we were about him. He was very charismatic and charming. His sister "Annie" was adorable and had such a sparkling personality. We all just talked about anything and everything. We were getting to know each other better. Grace said her husband "Mike" would be there shortly. As we waited on Mike, Elsie and I were able to observe how Grace interacted with Derek and Annie. She was calm, mellow, and went with the flow. We waited for Mike before we began eating, but Derek couldn’t wait. He was hungry, so Grace let the children eat.

It wasn’t until Mike arrived that we started to discuss Derek. We were informed that Derek was diagnosed with autism when he was about five years of age. A doctor in Utah made the diagnosis and has helped them on their journey to being the best teachers in Derek’s life. Mike informed Elsie and I that he and Grace have really worked with Derek. We could see that their hard work has paid off. Derek’s social skills were amazing. Even Annie participates in helping Derek. Mike said that Derek will be reading to Annie and say different words. Annie will straighten him out by saying, "You know that’s not what it says." Before you know it Derek is reading the right words. She helps keep him in line.

Grace and Mike’s dedication to Derek is phenomenal. They have made the best of a trying situation. Mike told us that Derek really enjoys racing. They have seen several races and has even helped in the pit at one of those races. Mike says that Derek’s mind runs so fast that he feels one day Derek could be a car racer. His reasoning is that those race car drivers have to have quick thinking with all that goes on while racing. Mike feels that Derek could possibly have what it takes to be a race car driver.

Mike told us a story about how Derek, who is currently a fourth grader, had a substitute in class. Derek was coloring away as the substitute was talking about the life cycle of a butterfly. The teacher showed the class a picture and described what was in it. The teacher asked Derek if he knew what stage this was and without even lifting his head Derek answered the teacher. I was amazed. I can’t even take notes while listening to a lecture because I lose my concentration and miss out on key points. Derek is superman to me - he can multitask!

We talked about the school Derek attends. Neither Mike nor Grace seemed too happy with the special needs teacher. They said they would like to see Derek in the classroom more. Derek only spends the first thirty minutes in the regular classroom. The rest of the time he is in a special needs class. He does however go the specials (music, P.E. etc.) with his regular class.

I was truly touched listening to this family talk about their life journey with Derek. The love they have for each other was so wonderful. I forgot how chilly it was outside because I was so warmed by this family. I left the park with a smile on my face just thinking about Derek. He is a great kid with plenty of potential. I hope that one day I do read in the newspaper or magazine that Derek becomes the first race car driver with autism. What a great day in history that would be!

　

* Please note that the persons’ names in this paper have been changed to protect their privacy.